Chronicling the beginning of the pregnancy

My first pregnancy….

I woke up Monday morning and decided sure, what the heck… might as well take a test and once again prove to myself that another month (ok, another week or so) had gone by and still no baby. I took the test and within seconds the faint positive sign appeared. I was shocked. Could it be? The little plus sign I was waiting for, for all of these months was finally here. My first thought was to call my Keith at work.
I grabbed my cell phone and dialed his desk. I got no answer and assumed he was in his morning meeting. I then proceeded to send him a text message (ahh… the wave of the future..) that said, “Please excuse yourself from your meeting and call me back please.” Filled with joy I was now hysterical crying (a common trend of mine.) While waiting for his call I picked up the phone and called my friend Amber.
Amber has been through so much with me. We have taught at the same school for the last 5 years. I can call her day or night with problems big and small and she will just listen and then speak honestly to you. I couldn't wait for her to answer. I knew she would be elated! Finally, 2 rings and there she was…. I screamed/cried into the phone, “ I’M PREGNANT!” She was so overjoyed and asked if Keith knew. I told her I was waiting for him to call me back and he better hurry. I know me, patience are not a strong suit of mine. I hung up with Amber and seconds later the phone rang.
It was Keith. I shouted, “HUNNY, WE’RE PREGNANT!” I apologized for pulling him from the meeting but explained I didn’t want to spend my morning crying alone. That was the point he told me he was not in a meeting he was in the car. Oops, I looked at the clock, yeah it was not even 7:30 AM.
I was so overjoyed by the positive pee stick I didn’t even think about the time. Ok, so he wasn’t the first person to know, but he was supposed to be! Besides, plenty of people tell their friends first and then go and plan some extravagant way of breaking it to their husbands. I always said he would know because the burba carpet in the smallest guest room would be pulled up. It was the one room in our house I refused to touch until it was ready to be transformed into the nursery.
After I spoke to Keith, I had to continue the wonderful news. I mean come on, I did say a minute ago patience was not my strong suit. I must admit secrets are not easily kept either. I can keep other peoples secrets, just not my own. So I called Michelle next.
She is also one of my closest friends and she also works at mine and Amber’s school. Michelle has a son of her own, Jake. He is 1. Michelle was my first close friend to have a baby. I lived vicariously through her and couldn’t wait until we had play dates with our children.
Michelle answered and I once again screamed my news to her. I will never forget her words. After she congratulated me she said, “you are about to understand me on a whole new level.” I’m sure she would be right, but it was still too early for me to have a clue what she meant. I had to hurry up and hang up with Michelle because I now needed to get ready and go to work.
I was so excited. How pregnant was I? I stood in front of the mirror and looked back at my naked reflection. Finally, after 3 months of trying we had done it. I was not broken, as I often liked to refer to myself. I sang and danced and ran into my bedroom and told Diva, our dog, that she was going to be a sister. I explained to her that there was a baby in the belly and she was going to be a big sister. Ok, I know I might be a little whack-o, but up until now Diva was my only child. My world centered around her.
I finally pulled myself together and got dressed for work. Today was definitely the day I was to quit smoking. Quitting was a feat I had tried for years. I always said, the day I get pregnant will be my last one. Today was the day!
I drove to school that Monday morning with the biggest cheesy smile on my face. I talked to my belly and told it that this was a very good home and I promised to be as nurturing as I could be and then some. I gave my belly this pep talk so the fetus would want to stay implanted. Somehow I thought that this was a great strategy. I would come to find that this was only one of my MANY belly chats!
I arrived at school and saw a teacher who had fertility issues but last year was successful after In-Vitro. She would always ask if we were pregnant yet and I always replied no. That’s something I never understood, I have other friends who always asked too. If I was, I would tell you; but since I’m not, you just keep rubbing it in that you are….grrr… Anyway so as I walked past her I smirked guiltily as I asked her how she was feeling. She immediately knew, smiled and chased down the hall after me. She kept smiling saying, “you are, aren’t you?” I answered affirmatively. Here I was in the hallway telling someone I was not friends with that I was pregnant before my close friends. I was just SO excited and wanted to share it with the world. I knew I couldn’t tell everyone since we are all told that 12 weeks is the acceptable time, but she was pregnant and knew what I would be going through. We had this instant connection of pregnancy. It was a bond, a sisterhood. It didn’t matter that she was ready to pop and I was carrying around 1/10 of a pencil tip; we were pregnant! She congratulated me and I thanked her and continued on my way to my classroom.
Ok, I wasn’t telling anyone else. Certainly not my team, who I would eventually tell. But right now it was too early to tell them all. I walked to Carole’s room and there was my team. As usual they were all huddled around the coffee just chatting away. Except today the principal was in there too. This was one sure fire way to guarantee me not spilling the beans. Deep down inside I secretly wanted to walk into the room and scream it out loud, but with my principal there that was one sure fire deterrent. So, I walked into the room, grabbed my attendance and couldn’t exactly hold it. I walked over to Carole’s desk (I mean she is like our team mom) and smiled as wide as I could and said, “I have some great news. I’m pregnant!” She was very happy for me and we discussed I would be holding the secret for a bit. I think she knew I was good to hold the news for maybe 1 day tops.
It took about 1 hour before I spilled the beans to my team. My Principal and Assistant Principal were next. I couldn’t help it. I was an animal. I was so overjoyed I wanted to share it with the world! Ok, but that would be it. No more people. I needed to wait until I at least got to the OB/GYN. Which by the way didn’t open until 9 so I couldn’t call to make an appointment yet. It was now almost 9and I had told so many people I was a little frustrated with myself.
What if things didn’t work out? What if I bad karma really would happen with this? Is that possible? I live a good honest life and believe in karma. I believe because I do the right things, right things will happen to me. But, I did tell people way early. Is that a reason for bad karma to occur? No, it couldn’t be. Could it? Ahh…. My worrying about my unborn child has just begun.
9 o’clock rolled around and I called the gynecologist’s office. The receptionist answered the phone and I gleefully told her that I needed to make an appointment to see the doctor I was pregnant. She immediately asked for my birth date so she could find me in the computer. What? No congratulations? No Mazel Tov? Didn’t she know that I was excited? Ok, I let it go. I mean I am pregnant and that’s all that matters. She told me she had an appointment open on Tuesday at 1 PM. I snickered and told her I was a teacher and Tuesday is my kids first day back to school. I couldn’t possibly split my class on the first day of school, for dismissal no less. I apprehensively accepted the Wednesday appointment but not before inquiring if they had an appointment available for today. Alright, I was going to have to wait for Wednesday. It wasn’t the end of the world, right? I mean the hard part was already done. I was pregnant. I peed on the stick and already knew. The Dr. was just a formality. It’s not like I was going to go in there and walk out with a baby. I was just gonna have to wait it out.
So, Keith and I had arranged to meet at a restaurant for dinner. We were both so excited about the news. He told me that he felt it best if we didn’t tell anyone besides immediate family members until we were 12 weeks. I agreed hesitantly. He asked me who I told and I began my list followed by reasoning’s; She’s my best friend, I had to call her too, she’s on my team, he’s my principal, etc. You could tell he was not thrilled but as always he would get over it. We talked about how for the last 2 weeks or so at night I would tell him that I was kind of nauseous. Keith would say to me, “then go throw up.” (I know he’s sweet!) It was never that terrible nausea like you wanted to run to the bathroom, but just that something was a little off. We took bets on how pregnant we each thought we were. Seeing as how I was notorious for testing every other week he was going with 6 weeks. I was thinking wishfully and said at least 8. I figured if I had been nauseas for 2 weeks or so then this couldn’t be brand new. Symptoms don’t just show up from the moment of conception. Do they?
That night we went home and I was sleeping by 9 o’clock. A newly pregnant woman must get her rest. At one AM I was awoken by the sudden urge to use the bathroom. So, out of bed I went and of course the Diva followed to make sure I wasn’t going to run away. Diva and I returned to bed and fell right back to sleep. A few hours later, which I assumed was about 8 o’clock, I woke up and checked the clock.
Are you kidding me? 5AM! What is this, some kind of joke? I am not even kidding I was wide awake. I rolled over and started to poke at Keith. “Hunny, I’m up”, I said. Nothing. Not even a wince. So, I poked a little harder. Still, nothing. It was time to call in the cavalry. I reached under the blanket and slowly started to pet Diva. I woke her up and had her make her way out from under the covers.
She slowly moved to the head of the bed and gave me a good morning lick right on my cheek. I then said to her, “Go give daddy good morning kisses.” She immediately turned around and faced Keith. It was almost a shame too because he really did look very peaceful. Diva did what Diva does best. She stood on top of him with one paw on each side of his shoulders pinning him down with her 46 pound body and began to lick his face as if I had spread peanut butter from ear to ear.
It was official; Keith was now up and looking at me with a look that was anything but subtle. I laughed and told him I wasn’t up by choice, my body woke me up